I'm not a thespian, I like dick

Tonight I acted in a play. It was amatuer night all around, until I took the stage. The play focused on 1 martyr of Harmarket, Albert Parsons, and was put on at some dinner in Chicago. I was handed the script 30 minutes before the curtain went up.

Monday is May Day. The world (except the US) celebrates this day as THE international workers' day. It started in 1886 in Chicago. On Monday I will march in Chicago, clad in my black and red, being an undesirable citizen.

South Park

Today, fellow bloggers, I bring you amazing news; news that, in any other light, would be amusing or comical. While on my endless vigilence of the many different secured areas of this base, I stumbled onto an "internet commercial" that piqued my interest.

How did I come across this? I was searching for the amazing episode of South Park that will forever be glorified: The Cripple Fight.

Have a look at this strange commercial called "Shalom in the Home" ... and then watch the clip of the cripple fight:

http://www.tv.com/south-park/cripple-fight/episode/53957/summary.html

Lets open this up for discussion (the commercial)... all opinions welcome.

And you're only an English Major

An Engineer or patent attorney could no more express passionate romantic love than they could sing caged metal. But an English major can.

In the right hands the English language is like a musical insrument. So many minor languages, but why would one choose to speak or write one of them if one could speak or write English?...


Although, Francis Scott Key sounds as good--as any national antheme could sound--in any language, including Spanish!!!

Come May 1st I'll be marching in Chicago with the slogan No Borders No States.



I am an Undesirable Citizen.

My Surrogate Motherboard

I come to you from my mother's comcastic internet connection. Today there was a faint glimmer of hope. A call from FedEx at 7am woke not just me, but the possibility of a computer again. Unfortunately I had to work, and my buzzer doesnt work anyway even if I had not, so the possibility of me getting it even if it was on its way is kind of slim. I now hold out in the hopes that I can get a tracking number of some kind to arrange alternate pick-up options. I also will pay a visit to my building manager about a buzzer, a visit 6 months and 5 packages in the making..

You gotta orange clean your eyes for this

Chizeck it out ya'll. Here's a link to the movie I'm going to be in (I'm not in the clip but Billy Mayes is). I'll be going to the premier next Friday. Well thats all...I'll see ya'll in about 2 weeks ^___^

http://youtube.com/watch?v=X0CSysykAmM&search=hazardfilms

Self-Imposed Exile?

I don't care if the internet comes back, or my computer. I have time to read now, time to work out. Time to reinvent myself again. Loneliness has given way to a love of solitude. My motherboard will likely never come back to me. Let it stay where it is. I am content in my refuge that I once thought of as my prison. I can turn my phone off and stay in a world that has always offered more than the world outside, made even better now that it is free from the outside evil that has poisoned it. If no internet is a prison, I hope my day of parole does not come.

untitled

My maiden leaves me for another shore
And hope gives way to new uncertainty
Of all I knew, none have I cared for more
No other's loss I feel so painfully
You know my heart, but yours is mystery
Know all that I can say, all I will do
Your actions, though, are some surprise to me
For never have i felt as close with you
(here I abandon rhyme, as well as it may serve me)
That I loved you, surely you must know
But as surely I know too, it never was
And never could be as I wish.
For I would profane with my embrace,
The temple that I go to worship.
So you fly to your fate, and I remain motionless.
A strange inversion of the truth,
For we both know that it is you who is the center
And I who revolves around you

This is Ryan, from Kenosha

If you follow this link: http://www.wpr.org/webcasting/ideas_audioarchives.cfm?Code=bme , scroll down to Thursday, April 20, 5pm, click on listen and jump ahead 41 minutes into the show, you will hear the Good Gentleman ask the even gooder Amy Goodman and Ruth Somethingorother a question. You might also hear some asshole coughing in the background.

Don't Work on the Sabot

I worte a new knock knock joke earlier. I plan on sending it to A Prairie Home Companion ( <3 <3 <3 ) in time for the annual April Joke Show.

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Wooden shoe.
Wooden shoe who?
Wooden shoe like to fire your boss.


I expect only 3 will look up anything about a Sabot.

All Cars Go to Heaven

It finally happened. Once again my car crapped out on me. For some reason or another the gear selector is broken and the car doesn't recognize it when you try to put it in park or drive. Because I can't put it in park I can't start the car, also because it doesn't recognize being in park the safety release on the key won't let me get my key back. At the moment its in front of a Best Buy with the key in the ignition. It doesn't matter because it won't start. This time I don't care how much or how little it would take to fix it because I'm done repairing it. I spent too much money already on that damn car so I'm just going to junk it. On the plus side I won a bunch of nerf toys at a festival the other day. It all evens out in the end.

It's the Economy, Stupid

Let me lay it out.

The US has an enormous annual debt to China. And what does China do? Well, China buys US treasury Bonds, which, in turn, finances US Imperial Ambitions! It doesn't take a John Maynard Keynes to see how this works. So every shirt you buy that says made in China, every panda you fuck, every Great Wall you scale, know that you are supporting imperial ambitions.

Hawaii used to be an independent country.

If the US didn't interveen, nay, cause, the trouble in Cuba in 1896, Castro would not be in "power."

If the US did not interveen in the Philipeens..........perhaps I go too far...

I can't believe it's not identity theft.

I came home today and the cat was sleeping in my spot. I tried to move her but she bit me. This standoff could go on for days.






I think she's been pretending to be me. The other day I saw her drinking a 7-up.

Redemption denied

Alright! The sql server is up and running, I was able to login locally
etc. Etc. I've only had a short amount of time to work on it so forgive
my latency. Ill need to have someone with an updated client test out the
remote connection for me to see if I have everything setup right or
not.

Yeah, that's all. I won't make posts about the ro server here anymore~
ill make a separate blog rather soon and post the link on this nya post.

What you did "not see" on the radio

I woke up this morning to my alarm reminding me to buy tickets to see my favorite entertainment public radio show, A Prairie Home Companion. I bought 2 tickets, 1 for me and the other to wish the dead Andy! an Happy Birthday.

And Public Radio owned the rest of my day. Andy!, the Gentelman and I all have stories to tell about our NPR and Pacifica experiences today. As difficult as is will be to tell only mine, because all are intertwined, I feel these stories are too important for me to usurp as my own. My story begins with this man, Al "Grampa" Lewis.



Many Remorsers are intimate with his interview with Amy Goodman on Democracy Now!. A few of you have this interview downloaded onto your computer. For many of us, drinking with Al Lewis has become a weekly evening. Is there any better classroom than at the feet of your surrogate Grandfather? Feet that could race you around the block.

This afternoon, after watching and listening to a debate between Amy Goodman and Ruth somethingorother, at the Pabst Theater, while in line to get my terrorist food: humus, falafel, chocolate airplane, I stood closer to Amy Goodman than I am standing now at that line I should (not?) cross. And I said to that voice of the silent, I said, "I really love that interview you did with Al Lewis."

I've written emails to Democracy Now! about this interview; I've posted on pacifica forums about it; I spoke directly to Amy Goodman about it earlier today.

I don't lnow what to compare this to. I don't know the implications. I do know that I will be listening to Al Lewis again tonight.

Al Lewis Now!

Ore ha chinkasu janai!!!

Can you celebrate a birthday from beyond the grave. Since Andy! was declared dead I don't think we need to do anything. Well we could atleast get drunk in the memory of Andy!

Foam can't hide your shame

This past weekend I got incredibly drunk and went to one of the local bars. Wait incredibly isn't incredible enough to describe how drunk I was. Anyhoo, at this bar/dance club they were having a themed party. Theme = foam, lots and lots of soapy foam. For the most part it was really fun; I got to dance with a lot of girls as well as get wet. I'm not big on dancing but getting wet made it worth while. I don't remember a whole lot from that night but I do remember that at one point I was dancing with a Japanese girl that only comes up to about my nipple and the foam was about around my shoulders. At first I thought that you would be able to breathe while in the foam but I was wrong. So I had to pick this girl up and semi-dance/carry her to an area where the foam wasn't as high. It was a lot of fun but I wish I could remember more, perhaps its for the best. The next day I just had an overwhelming feeling that I had a lot of apologizing to do. I knew I would need those "I'm sorry" cards that I got from Wal-mart one day. Note to self: buy more sorry cards.

Can you see that I am serious?

------

UPDATE: I'm currently going through the stages of setting up the MySql database. All should be good soon (I had a rather unfortunate incident regarding previous installations, but whatever). In the mean time if you're interested in playing you should be downloading the ragnarok and sakray clients, here. You'll want to grab SAK SETUP0117.exe as well as RAG SETUP0117.part1.rar and RAG SETUP0117.part2.rar (and update them afterward).

I'm not 100% sure of whether or not those work, so let me know. Of course if you live around me I can just burn some cds or something. Personally I had some older clients laying around and I just updated them.. takes awhile -_-.

------

It has recently come to my attention that I have three dormant computers
at my house that are not earning their keep. Surely, something must be
done about this! So, I have decided once again to ressurect the Ragnarok
server of yore.

I figure I can go a little more hardcore on it this time, as I don't
have to worry about the pcs being used for anything but the server
itself. I'm going to go with an actual database as well, as opposed to
the plain text one I used last time. In addition, I can probably put the
character and map servers on separate machines.

Uhmmm.. I had a point to posting this... Oh yes, so if you're interested
let me know and I can set you up the RO once I get everything running. I
figure I can get a decent playerbase this time as well~ (and yes I'm
going to be rather conservative with drop rates/exp)

We have the technology, we can rebuild it.

Every piece used so far in this computer was destined for the garbage dump. Most of the hardware came from a file server nick named "R2D2". Drawing on it's heritage it has been renamed "TrashCan". I will soon have new processors and memory for it, and it shall begin a new career. More details to follow.

Evfery One Has 16 Great Great GrandParents

If you put an empty frame against a blank wall

forced to go through your life without a frame; without meaning

old letters and yellowed photographs and rendered meaningless

then you are emotocons, then you are abrvs., then you are ambiguities to the opaques make infinity.

facts become absolete and new theories replace old ones.



Fuck you with your new worlds that refuses to accept life as it is. Use organized language! It's not just a paradigmn, It's a way that we don't have to lose through any slow and eroding process. Fuck anyone who LOLs and BRBs.

And fuck Morgan Freeman...but only the Gentlelman and Andy! will know about that.

You asked for it, mr. Cp

Well, here you are. A mobile blog posting! This can only mean bad things
for the future of itchy remorse.

The very fact that I have mobile powers now makes me at least 2x as
dangerous as I was before. Woot.

Happy Zombie Day

I make messes.

Good thing I can always clean.

A Superstar Unhidden

I'm glad that in this late day in life that we can still celebrate and embrace the principles of Necrophilio, on this, his birthday. Replete with racism, Necro has kept all of us living in a zone of fear. He attends to his oppresion of us daily while pursuing the edge of imperial ambition. Not so much the edge, as he is the center of it.

Because of the way he uses the Jews to strong arm the Blacks against us, we don't know who were are as a people. He has kept us the most uninformed people on the face of the earth.

Necro, I thank you, on this, your birthday, for encouraging the process of using military engagement to settle our grievances. You and your Aikdo defensive skills make our world safe while turning upside down that of everyone else's.

Necro, I'm sorry for using your day of birth as an avenue for satire. Necro, the Gentleman and I have something planned for you tomorrow.

Even with all the torque you can muster, hew kin never fill the empty set I left behind

I am here! For a few seconds! My mother just got a new place and I helped her set up her cable internet. The price I exacted was a few moments on the internet so I could blog. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I am still alive. And just as predicted, without me and Andy, the tumbleweeds are indeed blowing across the blogscape.

I got shit on by a bird today.

I didn't see the bird, but I have to stain to prove he existed.

Why Didn't We Take More Pictures

It is with a sunken heart that this reporter posts this Andy! Obit. It's not a typo, there is no R in Obit...unless you spell it out as obituary. Andy! left us while we were still quite naive. Andy! wrote wonderful satirical pieces; gave colorful accounts of his exploits; was a liar; chronic acoholic; fun loving and flitatious; enjoyed date rape pills on himself; used cocain; an uncompromisingly direct voice of the people; flasher; enjoyed youloogies and gross mispellings.

He would not have wanted me to throw my hand ove my heart and only speak good about him after he passed. Why whould he? He's dead.

I'm establishing the Andy! Memorial Foundation . Please make out your checks to CASH. That's how Andy! would have wanted it.

Our Blog My Vision

Fellow Remorsers,

The current and only Adminstrator of the People's Doomlazer has likened his administration to that of a despotic dictatorship where he gets to eat children...your children.



What else is he eating...

The current Administrator also sits back while our blog is flooded with posts about Public Radio. He blames the ISPs, but we know that he is in bed with the anti-commercial Public Radio Aristocracy lobby. While he turns over to take more craphole sex from this lobby, our membership has turned over. We have lost 2 of the most active Remorsers, both of whom are afraid to speak out in public about what they know about the Administrator. He silences whistleblowers.



My Fellow Remorsers, it is my suspicion that the current Administrator has rushed to grant Remorser status to 3 new members as a way to stuff the ballot box.

Fellow Remorsers, if elected as the General Administrator in the upcoming elections, I will end the policy of baby eating, reduce the deluge of Public Radio posts, and seduce Andy! and Gentleman Jackass back into what could be our independent and democratic Blog society.

This doesn't happen in real life

The wierdest fucking thing happened to me last night. First of all I shouldn't tell you guys this but if you ever want anything from me just ask when I'm half asleep (I've given my brother the keys to my car once so you know how easily I can be pursauded to do something). Anyways, last night at around 3am I am awaken by someone nudging me and saying move over. So without thinking I just move to the edge of the bed and go back to sleep. A few minutes go by then I realize there's someone in bed with me that I don't even know.
"Who are you?"
"I'm fine."
"No, what's your name...who are you?"
"Kim"
I've never met this person before but I remembered that my buddy that lives across the hall from me had a girlfriend named Kim.
"Dave's across the hall."
"No he isn't."
"Huh?"
"This is the room."
"No it isn't, you need to go next door."
"Well how did I get in here then?"
"The door's unlocked."
For the next five minutes I get into a little bit of an argument with her because she believes she's in the right place. After this it finally cliques.
"WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES?!?"
Yup thats right she came into my room without any pants on and the next 5 minutes were spent looking for them.
"Look do you want to borrow a pair of shorts and give them back in the morning?"
"I don't even know you. Just take me to Dave's room."
So I take her across the hall to find that Dave's door is wide open and Dave was sleeping naked on his bed. Yeah I saw some Irish ass but I figured it was bound to happen sooner or later. After everything was done I went back to sleep but couldn't get any good sleep. I kept waking up every hour or so. So this is a big fuck you to Kim for ruining a good nights sleep.....bitches man, bitches.

Can you help me gt my arms back?

Good gravy, Marie, I love Pacifica Radio...and the CBC...and Al Jazeera...and French Public Radio...and NPR...and here's why (again):

Radio doesn't have pictures

Pacifica doesn't record the words of the powerful because they go to where the silence is

Pacifica has no one to apologize to...although I've written to stations managers before with words of condemnation

International news corporations in this country report differently than they do in other countries

Pacifica is grassroots and its existence place a spotlight on the inherent contradictions of other media

I'm saying this because I've been working on my internship application for public radio. Unfortunately, it's not for Pacifica. But NPR is a start. I'll burrow from within.

Howdy.

Hi guys. Its Meg. Bill finally put me back on here again. OCB was fun. Thanx Bill. That is all.

Insomnia's haiku

Like smackos, melting
Onto the shag carpet: brains
um, crussel did it

Frank Gilmore?

I lack discipline

I'm not sure what I was trying to accomplish with this, as I meant to post it awhile ago. Make of it what you will. (My take on the gentleman's -oke will come shortly, I swear. For real this time)

Starring Everybody and Me!

So I have a friend that's studying film to become a film director and I've been in quite a few of his films. It's his senior year and I'll be in his senior thesis film, but the cool thing about this is this film will actually be shown in a movie theater. I don't play a big part in the film but it will still be fun to see myself on the big screen. I'm not exactly sure what the film is about (I think it has something to do with time travel) but I can tell ya'll about the scene I'm in. Jesus Christ is playing playstation 2 when he hears a knock on the door. He goes to answer it only to be taken by suprise by a roman soldier (me). I take Jesus to a ceaser looking guy to get his crown of thorns and when he's carrying his cross I shove him and thats it. The film is still being edited and whatnot so I haven't seen the entire thing yet. I should be getting a DVD with everything that I've been in before the summer. This was a lot of fun and I wouldn't mind doing it again.

What I Want is What They're Selling

Since the only TV I've been watching is my namesake gameshow MatchGame, I'm exposed to a limited and very select repetition of commercials. I think I've figured out the type of audience that Industry thinks watches MatchGame. This professional and scientific study is based on my last 2 weeks watching MatchGame.

These are the most common commercials.

Com1: A child scribbles on a pad with a water pen without any mess
Com2: A Bus full of Prescription Drugs travels the country targeting seniors.
Com3: Information about how to treat and/or prevent genital herpes.

I've concluded that the typical MatchGame viewer is a sexually promiscuous immature/senilie medicare addict.

I'll be publishing my results in the Journal of MatchGame shortly. BTW, my title line smacks of Goldstein...Any guesses on what book it's from. Hint: Not Gargantos.

Don't Hate the Player, Hate the Bill

How the fuck did the Blog Administrator allow someone new to join the blog without first making them join the blog's Whuffleball Blog Team and Abortions Are Funny Girls Scout's Troupe first? These are the trial teams that I thought every new Blog member went through so that the established members can judge any new pledge. The blog Administrator is out of order and should be put to sleep. Well, maybe just made to nap a lot. I like it when Bill naps because I get to give him butt sex without him knowing about it...until now.

Before the new pledge can become a full fledged member, I move that he first make a blog about Public Radio. The Gentelman and Andy! will agree with me on this one...oh, fuck, both are out of communication.

So Ive been listening to French Public Radio. I don't understand any of it, but it's fricken awesome. Fucking Eifle Tower, yo!

S.O.B.

Thanks and Keep Listening!

I made my first attempt to contact A Prairie Home Companion last night. This afternoon PHC validated me with a response. I sent in 2 jokes to PHC for use in the upcoming annual April Joke Show. 1 I wrote myself, the other is the funniest joke I know. It is so funny that it laughs at you as if you were in Russia.

Knock Knock
Who's There
Hebrews
Hebrews Who
Hebrews the coffee and she fries the eggs

A man walks into a bar and says, "Hi, it's me." Everyone turned around but it wasn't him.

The really funny thing is that for the last 2 months I've been active in the Fetchen some Gretchen writing campaign. I never heard back despite my efforts. My first attempts to contact Martha Barnett and Garrison Keillor, however, were sucesses.

My libido is bound to the very show that lays my virility in suspect.

But nothing makes this post more impotent than Andy! leaving for Florida--where public radio is little more than news about who wrestled the largest gator--and not writing a "You go girl," in the comments.

Once again.......

For the third time(I think) I am listing the pros and cons of Andy being away in FL

PRO

1. The apartment will stop smelling like onions(does Alton Brown cook ANYthing without onions in it?)
   
2. Less furniture will be broken
3. No drunken attacks on my opinions/my interests/my person
   

CON

1. No free meals Saturday night
2. Less public radio(possibly could be listed in the pro column as well)
3. No computer in the house

That is all.

Two Minutes Hate

All Things Considered evil result from Emmanuel Goldstein. His Worldview is one of oppression and unfreedom. He invented terrorism so that neither you or your companion can enjoy your Prairie Home. He gets right To The Point about trying to overthrow The Party. He is not invited to The Party. The worst thing in that he drives an Odyssey mini-van. Emmanuel Goldstein caused all this immigration and disruption. He raised the price of oil through infiltrating the MarketPlace. What a breathe of Fresh Air it will be if someone other than Andy! gets the references. Emmanuel Goldstein sometimes travels as Emma Goldman. It is the Sound Opinion of The Party that Goldstein be hunted down as the enemy of Public Radio that he is.

Will I Ever go Over the Top

I'm only equipped to do upper body working out. Arms, chest and shoulders. That's all. I'm been working out one of those areas every day for the last 12 days...and I still can't bench my own weight! My makeshift bench bar is a laundry basket filled with heavy crap. I'm doing third world peasant exercisizes in the 21st century. I wouldn't have any tricepts if it wasn't for all the time I spend churning butter. I'm a rack on bones covered by a thin layer of a sinewy facade. Honestly, I have a hard time carrying a 30 pack of PBR. I guess all I'm asking for is a homegrown way to build some strenght so I can lift up my motorcycle should it fall on me.

He wanted a 13 but they drew a 31

Monday I get my ink done. I apreciate the offers to come with me, but this is to be a thing with me and my mother, sorry. This is the image I have chosen. It is one of my favorite depictions of a skeleton, because it throws the elements of smoking and drinking into the mix as well.